Things I have bought and recommend... to deal with my information addiction
and make friends with monsters
Summary
In this post I talk about how I found it hard to be without addictive information streams. I talk about a bunch of solutions:
Meditation (specifically using the Waking Up app)
Buying a Kindle and using Push to Kindle
Buying a “phone basket”
Buying a “house phone”
Buying a “writing laptop”
I support the above with a life-review process in which I gather data on my usage and reflect on whether I need to change anything.
These interventions have improved my ability to stay productive. And by removing distraction, they have also helped me to see and accept more of the negative thoughts and feelings that have been driving the addiction in the first place.
The Sound of Silence is bad
In 2019, I was talking to a friend about what we did when we were travelling on the London Underground. (I suspect I was trying to boast about all the cool podcasts that I listen to on 2x speed). I remember her answer clearly. She told me that…she just sits there…in silence…
with her thoughts!?
This idea made me uncomfortable. I genuinely couldn’t remember a journey where I hadn’t been listening to a podcast or some music. In fact, one time around then, I had realised, just outside the station near my flat, that I had forgotten my headphones. Terrified by the thought of facing the next 30 minutes of my commute in silence, I sprinted home to retrieve them. I preferred the idea of being late to work to just sitting there on the train.
I got a smartphone for the first time in the early 2010s. I remember going shopping with my partner at that time. I usually found this painfully dull. But with my new phone, I was able to browse reddit as she tried on clothes. “I will never have to be bored again”, I thought to myself.
Several years later I realised that there was a problem with this never-bordem. One day a few years ago, as I sat on the train on the way home from work, I reached into my breast pocket to retrieve my phone. As my hand rested on the glass and metal, I noticed a powerful sense of relief. In that moment there was a deep feeling of calm, like I had just escaped something horrible. I don’t know why I hadn’t noticed this before, but it was clear at that moment that I really needed my phone. The phone helped me get away something that I did not like. The phone gave me access to soothing information. It gave me nice friendly concepts to fill the darkness that was otherwise filled with the bad things.
This realisation was a little disturbing. Especially when I noticed the strength of the desire for my phone in moments that I really didn't want to be distracted - e.g. when I had intended to do important work, or was wanting to connect with friends.
Part of me also knew that there was something that I needed to see in the darkness. Something monstrous and terrifying, but important and true about myself or the world. Sitting behind the discomfort were insights about my motivations, my values and my beliefs about the world. I just had to pull myself away from my screens.
The addiction cycle
After noticing my addiction, I tried to deal with it. I installed apps (e.g. rescue time) to start tracking how long I was using my phone, and started researching how to limit my use. To my surprise, my initial attempts consistently failed. I would set up blocks on websites to help me use them less and I uninstalled lots of addictive apps. But I always either found ways around these blocks, or found another (often even more pointless) information stream to get hooked on (I am very embarrassed by how much time I have spent scrolling LinkedIn). Or I would set up a block, be free and able to live without the screens for a while, then convince myself that I could just use those apps a little bit. A little bit quickly becomes a little bit more, then soon I’m spending an entire evening doom scrolling TikTok, I’ve forgotten to have dinner or drink anything, and I’m too dopamine-brained to get to sleep before 2am. I didn’t know it at the time, but this is actually a fairly standard relapse pattern for substance addicts too.
I set up my regular review process a few years ago, and dealing with my information addiction has regularly formed a significant part of that. I regularly ask myself how much time I am spending on these apps and what if anything I can do to ensure it’s not distracting me from more important things in my life. I now have a bunch of tools that I will keep iterating. Here is what I use now:
Waking Up app
($119 per year)
Suggesting an app is ironic, but the most important thing I have done is get good at meditating. Meditation has allowed me to get better at being with the thoughts and feelings that are pushing me to addiction in the first place. I had tried a few apps before, but Waking Up was the one that I liked and stuck with the most. I did the intro course in 2019 and have had a consistent meditation practice since then (more important than the app however was having others to meditate with on a regular basis).
Cold Turkey
(£29 once)
I really like Cold Turkey. It’s very annoying. I only started using it to a significant degree in the last year, but it’s so brutal it’s amazing. It’s a website blocker that once you turn it on, makes it basically impossible to get access to the sites that you’ve blocked. Multiple times while writing this post, in moments when I’ve felt a little stuck as to what to write, I have reflexively opened a new tab and tried to open Twitter; Cold Turkey has stopped me in my tracks…
Here is a graph of my social media use earlier this year, along with the times I made my Cold Turkey settings more strict.
If you use Cold Turkey I strongly recommend also setting up a regular process to review how you are using it and how you might be able to use it better (e.g. as part of a weekly or monthly review). Or set up a regular accountability call with a friend.
Focusmate
($5 per month)
Focusmate is a website that randomly pairs you with another user for co-working. If you don't work alongside colleagues (I didn’t for the past 18 months), staying focussed on work at a computer can be pretty hard. Quite strangely, despite only saying a few words to the other person in the calls there is always a real sense of connection, and comradery. This helps me feel motivated and accountable, and keeps me away from those distracting information streams.
Kindle + Push to Kindle
(~ £50 for a second-hand kindle, $2.99 per month for Push to Kindle)
I read a lot of blogs and articles (which generally don’t feel so addictive). I used to read these on my PC where I would often find them after opening my email. But given that my PC is also where the addictive stuff is, I needed to find a way to get the good information away from the bad information.
So I started using a Kindle. Kindle allows you to email documents to it, so I did that for a little bit. Downloading and emailing blog posts to the kindle to read later. But last year I found Push to Kindle, a chrome extension that allows you to send any webpage to your Kindle with one click. It’s very convenient and means I can spend more time reading in my hammock and less time on my PC, browsing social media.
Phone basket
(<£5 - for something like this)
My partner and I don’t take our main phones into our flat. We have a basket by the door to store and charge our phones as soon as we get home. If we need to check our messages, we go to the basket. I recommend buying a phone basket.
House Phone
(<£100 for a cheap smartphone)
This is actually the one I’m most evangelical about. I used to keep my phone with me in bed. I like listening to audiobooks at night, and I need an alarm clock anyway, so why not!? Smartphone in bed meant I used to look at it in bed a lot, right before I tried to go to sleep and first thing when I woke up. This was not good, but I still wanted to listen to audiobooks so I didn't know what to do. Until I realised I could just buy a separate phone! On this phone, I only have apps that I want to use in the house - i.e. an audiobook app, a clock app, Spotify, Waking Up, and not much else.
I bought an Ulefone a few years ago and it feels like a good option. I wanted something that I could have in bed with me, which didn’t need a tonne of charging (so the alarm didn’t run out)
Some people also recommend a physical alarm clock. This seems good too, but I prefer the house phone.
Writing laptop
(<£100)
I wanted a computer to write on that I only use for writing (I block everything else). So I bought a 2nd-hand chrome book for £60 on Ebay! This has helped me write more. I suspect you could do this for other computer-based activities that you want to do more of, but risk being distracted from.
I realise after writing this that I am mostly just recommending buying more devices. Devices that you only use for one thing that you are sure you want to do. This does seem like my general strategy (alongside blocking, meditation and accountability), and I endorse it strongly.
I’m not over my addiction. While writing this post, I tried to open Twitter more than once (I failed because I have used up my daily 15 minutes… thanks Cold Turkey!). But I can now stay more focussed on things that are better for me for longer. I have also gotten better at sitting with discomfort. I can ride the train in silence and be with the thoughts and feelings that arise. Not having information streams to escape into has meant I have been able to explore the darkness. And the lack of distraction has allowed me to start making friends with the monsters I’ve found.
thanks for this! I've been toying with the idea of a 'phone basket at the door' for a while now, your post may push me to finally set that up.
Re. 'Buying a Kindle and using Push to Kindle' -- I've also found Kobo ereaders work well with the Pocket app for this, they've got a direct integration.